The Flip Side of that Well Worn Coin
by honestgreenpirate
Summary: When you think of a tag along traveling with Sam and Dean you see all the good - think about it, what makes you think it will be so fantastic? Nothing to do with my other story.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is in no way supposed to be offensive to anyone writing a story that involves someone travelling with the boys - I'm doing it and how hypocritical do you think I wanna be. Also, it's not a parody, it's supposed to be vaguely serious. I wanted to look at the down side of being stuck in the Impala with the boys. Also (again) this has NOTHING to do with my other Supernatural story, the "you" in this story isn't Grace. Hope you enjoy!**

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The Flip Side of that Well Worn Coin

You are quiet and unobtrusive.

You are happy, but it is not immediately obvious.

You try hard not to intrude and end up looking unfriendly and stuck up.

You are confused and worry that you are just an annoying burden, or, at best, no more than a baby sister to both of them.

You are nomadic, roaming the country from motel room to motel room, nothing to tie you to any one place. No privacy and no space to be by yourself, be alone and silent so you can just think, away from the constant hum of conversation and teasing and the steady pulse of rock music.

Guys look at you and think you're pretty enough, but a mystery and too much like hard work.

Girls look at you and judge – see you as either inconsequential and no match to themselves, or as a rival.

Sometimes people get completely the wrong impression of you. You travel the United States with two men, you wear battered jeans and faded t-shirts and solid looking boots like a uniform, the sound of Led Zeppelin surrounds you like an aura. But you're not particularly outgoing or easy. You've never really been rebellious. You've always valued family and home. You like to sleep rather than stay out all night drinking.

You sit in booths in diner after diner with the boys. Bored waitresses, wearing skirts so short they're like belts, completely ignore you, focusing all their attention on the men you are with.

You see very little of hunts, but sometimes you meet the victims and so often they are girls. Girls who are beautiful and clever and brave and receiving the full focus of the boys' attention. And these girls watch you and try to decide which brother you belong to. The results vary depending on where their own interests lie.

You hang out in bars, sometimes playing darts or pool, knocking back a couple of beers. The predatory girls look at you with derision and wonder what two such fine young men are doing with you.

The girls behind the bar ignore you in favour of the men that surround you, those that are willing to flirt for a few minutes. You're rarely allowed to go and get the drinks anymore.

The girls that like to play games carefully scope out the situation and realize that, for whatever reason, you are important to the boys so they make the effort to be nice to you to get to them. This is worse than being ignored.

Most men who are interested in you are immediately deterred by the presence of the two men at your side. The ones who work up the courage to talk to you are often quickly shut down by an over protective arm around your shoulders and a few choice words and sometimes you don't even mind when Dean does that.

The only times you get to hold proper conversations with guys is when Sam stops Dean from interfering and it's nice and you enjoy it.

But it's never the same and you have to start from the beginning and lie and you rarely get goosebumps from these random guys. And even when you do it is mere hours until you are on the road again, in the back of the Impala with no legroom, and on your way to some unknown destination where you would have to start again.

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**A/N: I have written more of this where it gets a bit lighter and more generic and heads towards a resolution - if you want to read that let me know and I'll post it. If not, I'm just going to leave it as this vaguely bleak one shot.**

**Also wanted to experiment writing in this style - how did it go?**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:**** This is set a few years after the first chapter when the girl is no longer traveling with the Winchesters but has her own house/flat, but sees them every now and again.**

The Flip Side of that Well Worn Coin

Chapter Two

_Two Years Later_

After time, a lot of time, you begin to notice things seem to be changing.

Usually there is other, more important things going on, or he has too much else to think about, but every now and again you catch him watching you. Sometimes you can just feel his eyes on your back and you don't turn around because you don't want him to know that you know.

And when you happen to be staying in the same place, you sleep in the same bed, like you always used to. It makes sense. The motel rooms have only two beds and your apartment isn't huge, the brother takes the couch.

Now, however, he is much more likely to sling an arm around you or over you at some point during the night and, despite those first ground rules of him keeping his hands and feet to himself, you don't care.

And now, when you aren't together, when he isn't sharing your bed and breathing softly beside you, you find it hard to sleep.

Sometimes you feel him press a light kiss to your forehead or drop one into your hair, when he thinks that you are asleep.

One morning, you wake up, and you are facing each other, and he's watching you. You smile slightly before closing your eyes again, happy to go back to sleep. He smiles in return, and kisses you on the cheek before he gets up to go and have a shower.

Not two days later, he wakes up and watches you sleep. Soon he leans in from where his head was resting on the pillow, and kisses you, firm but sweet, full on the lips. You wake up, and smile, and kiss him back for a moment.

When he pulls away you are both smiling and remain stock still, looking into the others eyes for a full minute. Then he winks and gets up, and you turn over and burrow back down into your quilt. He always does get up too early.

Then there comes the morning when he wakes you up with a kiss to the temple and a whispered offer of coffee, and you wonder if there could possibly be a better way to wake up in the mornings. And you smile and open your eyes and he's smiling back at you.

But then you register that he's lying on top of the covers, and he's fully dressed, and there's an apology in his eyes, and your smile fades.

He's leaving and suddenly you feel scared. Your hand reaches out of its own violation and holds onto his shirt, your fingers slipping through to the t-shirt underneath.

He watches you for a moment before reaching forward and kissing you on the forehead, getting up and quickly leaving the room.

You lie stock still for hours or minutes, you don't know. But when you get up and go into the kitchen there is fresh coffee in the pot, the Impala has vanished from the driveway and both Sam and Dean have gone.

Just for a moment you allow yourself to wish that he didn't have to do this, that he could stop hunting and leave the apocalypse to someone else. And it hurts more because you know he often wishes the same.

But you also know that if he wasn't a hunter he would be a completely different person and you might not love that person. And he couldn't retire, not now. He couldn't leave his brother and the demons and the angels and the apocalypse.

So you sigh.

And pour yourself a cup of coffee.

And set about living your life while you wait for his next phone call.

**A/N:**** Supposedly a little happier than the first chapter but I don't know that it turned out like that.**

**I wanted to leave which of the boys she was talking about ambiguous but I couldn't help writing it with one of them in mind. It might be pretty obvious – which do you reckon, Sammy or Dean?**

**Hope you liked anyway.**


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